Film & Water #50 – Golan/Globus Gala!

THE FILM & WATER PODCAST

Episode 50: GOLAN/GLOBUS GALA!

It's the 50th episode of the FILM AND WATER PODCAST, and we're exploding with excitement! This double-sized episode celebrates the filmography of legendary producers Golan/Globus, taking a look back at six of their films with these special guests:

  • KING SOLOMON'S MINES w/Aaron Bias
  • THE APPLE w/David Gutierrez
  • COBRA w/Bobby Mort
  • BLOODSPORT w/Clinton Robison
  • BOLERO w/Daniel Budnik
  • MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE w/Nathaniel Wayne

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25 responses to “Film & Water #50 – Golan/Globus Gala!

  1. An amazing episode. Everybody had amazing and wonderfully entertaining things to say (except for that jackass talking about Bloodsport).

    A few things to say:
    1.) Rob, thanks for having me. Sorry if this kills the show.
    2.) Everybody else, I’m so so sorry. Just skip me.

    Now, when is there a Fire and Water Network singalong version of “Winner Takes It All” coming out?

  2. Aside from the movie I’m actually on here talking about the only one I’d seen was the Apple. And EVERYBODY should see The Apple. I saw it as part of something a group of friends will sometimes do: Margarita Movies – Movies you need alcohol to get through. They’d always make themed drinks so it was a variant on apple martinis for this one. So my memory is hazy but there was just a great of “What the hell is THIS?” capped off with “Hold on, is that the bad guy from Lethal Weapon 2 taking everybody to heaven?” Like I said. Everybody should see this.

    Bonus, Professor Sprout from the first two Harry Potter movies is the landlord.

    1. OH! I ALMOST forgot. The choreography is by Nigel Lythgoe – the judge from So You Think You Can Dance. If nobody who was ever rejected on that show has ever said “Fuck you, you choreographed The Apple, you don’t know SHIT!” then there’s something wrong with the world.

    2. I saw THE APPLE on a double feature in a theater with the transcendent STUNT ROCK a few years ago. Fantastic double feature… and THE APPLE is, indeed, a movie everyone needs to see. I think matching it with THE PHYNX might create the ultimate in strange music-related double features.

  3. Man, what a FUN show! I wasn’t aware of The Apple or Bolero (and my early teen self is very sad about that), but I know the rest quite well. My friends and I constantly rented movies we had no business watching from a local video store in town, ran by a guy who had no problem handing out such mind-warping material to young, impressionable minds. Van Damme was a favorite of ours, as his movies often dispensed with much in the way of plot, and just had him kicking the crap out of bad guys. Hey, we were kids!

    Masters of the Universe was the one I was most interested in. I was a HUGE MOTU fan. I had every toy released up until shortly before the movie came out. I was disappointed by the movie for the same reasons Nathanial pointed out. Too much Earth, not enough He-Man. I will concede Langella is a hoot as Skeletor, without being so hammy you smell bacon when watching it on Netflix. His Dracula was far more subdued, but no less effective, really. The later He-Man mini-comics did adopt the Prince Adam/Orko Filmation trappings, but yeah, the early insert comics had He-Man as a noble barbarian type only. So I really didn’t have a problem with that. But I can see Nathaniel’s point. I plan on rewatching the film soon, as it is out on Netflix.

    And I’m definitely going to check out that documentary!!! Sounds fascinating.

    Oh, and I loved the trailers! We got Peter (Optimus Prime) Cullen and Danny (Super Friends Superman) Dark doing the narration. Bonus!!!

    Great job to all the guests, and Happy 50th episode, Rob!

    Chris

  4. In the early ’80s, producers Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer were trying to get their project BEVERLY HILLS COP off the ground. The script had gone through several drafts positioning it as a straight action movie. They brought in a new writer named Daniel Petrie who injected a lot more humor into the script because Bruckheimer apparently wanted to give the role to Eddy Murphy. Higher-ups at Paramount, however, gave the script to Sylvester Stallone.

    Stallone did massive rewrites for the BHC script, taking out almost all of the jokes, creating more elaborate action pieces, and changing the name of the lead character from Axel Foley to Axel Cobretti so he could be nicknamed “Cobra” throughout the movie. Stallone’s changes dismayed Simpson and Bruckheimer, and the projected cost based on Stallone’s rewrites made Paramount nervous, so they worked out a deal to get the original script/story back from Stallone and Petrie would help Stallone craft his ideas into the movie that would eventually become COBRA, although without Petrie’s name on any of the final credits.

  5. Worth it just to hear Rob sing “SpeeEEEEeeeeddd!”

    Most fun I’ve had in forever! And it’s always good to hear my buddy Bobby’s thoughts on “Cobra.”

    Loved the insights on Bloodsport, MotU and Alan Quartermain. These movies could easily have been there own episodes.

  6. Many of these movies were the late night fare of the early days of cable and as a result have a special place in my heart.

    I *love* Bloodsport for some reason and will watch it whenever I see it is on. There are so many lines that I slyly insert into everyday conversation – ‘You broke my record, now I break you.’ ‘Next time you fight, try to keep your clothes on.’ ‘We of the Kokoruki clan salute you.’ ‘Heh – you are American ___hole who plays tricks with bricks.’ I have seen this movie way too much.

    Masters of the Universe feels like Kirby on screen.

    I do hope that Lifeforce gets covered on the next installment. But I hope my dark horse Golan/Globus pick ‘The Wicked Lady’ gets covered. I haven’t seen that movie in 30 years but young Anj loved it.

  7. I couldn’t help myself, and watched the “Electric Boogaloo” documentary last night. WOW!!! What a wild, crazy ride. A great documentary in it’s own right, but man, the stories! And the clips! Including the scene with Olivia D’Abo, which based on this episode, made me feel REALLY awkward and skeevy. I always liked her in other things (she was Kevin’s big sister on The Wonder Years, and the voice of Star Sapphire on JLU), and found her very attractive, but yeah, this was not right.

    Speaking of things “not right”, that teen sex comedy that Golan’s favorite director made in Israel and then remade here…the one with the girl from Better Off Dead and Bill & Ted…did that come BEFORE or AFTER Fast Times at Ridgemont High? Some of the situations seem VERY similar to that classic film.

    Looking forward to part two!!!

    Chris

  8. Sorry i couldn’t participate. i was supposed to cover Delta Force; but, life events interfered. I was in college, when it came out, going through on an ROTC scholarship (USN). We had grown up in the shadow of Vietnam, Watergate, and the Iran rescue debacle. The American military was pretty impotent in that period and the movies tended to reflect it. The mantra of the Reagan Administration was very “Rah, Rah! for the military and the movies of that era reflected it and Golan and Globus jumped onboard. Just as Clint Eastwood snapped up a film about the glorious victory of Grenada (sarcasm meter in danger of exploding) the Cannon Films bottom feeders jumped on a recent newsworthy event, the TWA hijiacking. in 1985. Terrorists hijacked the plane and separated hostages with Jewish names and killed a Navy diver, while demanding the release of 700 Shi’ites in Israeli custody. The news media spoke of Delta Force being mobilized; but no rescue came. Again. So, Golan and Globus decided to make it happen on film.

    Chuck Norris gets to play wooden soldier (via his wooden acting) while Lee Marvin wraps up a career with the worst choice he ever made. However, the film is pretty watchable, thanks to a cast of great actors, like Marvin, George Kennedy, Martin Balsam, Shelly Winters, Lainie Kazan, Joey Bishop (okay, not a great actor; but, he’s good here) and Robert Vaughn. Delta is sent in and they have borrowed motorcycles from Megaforce, complete with rockets (no doubt built from an Estes kit), and submachine guns, mounted on the handlebars. American Ninja and I’m Gonna Get You Sucka’s Steve James is also along to add to the karate badassery. Chuck gets to round kick a few Arab/Palestinians and there are many vehicles blown up, while everyone is rescued. Of course, Chuck gets one of the weaponized Kawasakis (or whatever they were).

    Look at that cast again: 4 Academy Award winners!!!!!!!!!! They elevated a lot of crappy dialogue and silly action sequences that weren’t half as well staged as Megaforce. The lesser cast isn’t bad either, though the script is a bit much, at times, during the hijacking scenes.

    Golan and Globus had previously produced a film, in Israel (Mivtsa Yonatan, aka Operation Thunderbolt), about the Israeli commando mission that freed the hostages of an Air France plane, in Entebbe, uganda (an amazing feat and still the most spectacular rescue mission ever successfully attempted). They pretty much recycled the same idea here.

    G & G did a lot to keep Chuck Norris’ film career alive, after a string of pretty boring martial arts movies (even the Octagon is a bit of a snoozer, for much of the film). Of course, his best is still Invasion USA, where he fights Richard Lynch and his band of inept Soviet-backed terrorists, in the NRA’s wet dream. The film is all kinds of stupid; but, it has Richard Lynch and his evil sneer, which makes anything entertaining.

  9. I never saw The Apple (thank my lucky stars); but, love Vladek Sheybal. The man is never bad. Why he was never in Batman is probably due to working mostly in England, in the 60s. He’s also in one of Michael Caine’s Harry Palmer films, The Billion Dollar Brain (directed by Ken Russell). He’s also in Smiley’s People, with Alec Guiness. In the 60s and 70s, he’s all over the ITV adventure series, turning up in The Saint, The Champions, Callan and UFO. He missed The Avengers; but, he made it into The New Avengers.

    Oh, by the way, it’s Maryam d’Abo in The Living Daylights, not Olivia. They are distant cousins, though.

    John Dereck is a pretty good looking guy, which partially explains his success with the wives; but, even more, he was also very controlling and they had insecurities. He’s often been described as a Svengali and it doesn’t take much to back that up. He did a lot to build his wives’ careers, as he was very shrewd about how he did it. Notice that none of them ever learned to become even a good actress.

    He-Man is a guilty pleasure. It has enough good moments to keep me interested. Once I heard the director commentary, I understood why. He was a big fan of Jack Kirby and he borrowed heavily from Kirby, especially the Fourth World. He-Man becomes Orion and Skeletor is Darkseid (with some Doctor Doom). The key device is a Mother Box and it creates a Boom Tube. Teela has a bit of Barda and Evillynn has elements of Granny Goodness and the Female Furies. Beast Man is very much Kalibak. When we see Skeletor in his floating barge, coming out of the Boom Tube, with his war machines and He-Man attacks on flying discs, it’s pure Kirby. As you guys say, the director and the actors really try to make a good movie and at least made a decent B-movie.

    Bloodsport is another guilty pleasure, though the tournament fights are swipes from Enter the Dragon and other, better martial arts films. Van Damme is terrible, every time he opens his mouth. Bolo Yeung makes the film work, as much as anyone. It’s total BS as is every claim that ever came out of Frank Dux’s mouth. The UFC has proven what nonsense claims like his are. The only things more ridiculous than Frank Dux, in martial arts, were Count Dante (as advertised in comics of the 70s) and Ashida Kim and his ninja books. Dante claimed to be a master of multiple deadly martial arts but actually was a hairdresser, who had a better hairdo and beard than martial arts prowess. Ashida Kim claimed to be a ninja master; but was a white guy who writes fantasies about ninja mind control methods and other nonsense, sold via disreputable publishers like Paladin Press. Both perpetuated the myth of “dim mak,” the “death-touch,” which could allegedly channel the power of the person’s chi and even kill someone. Needless to say, it hasn’t exactly made anyone an MMA champion. The one pressure-point fighter who tried the UFC got his clock cleaned pretty badly and mostly stuck with basic striking techniques. Anyway, this is a decent film, with some good fights. It’s still somewhere below the made for tv movie, Men of the Dragon (with Jared Martin and Robert Ito, from 1974) and The Last Ninja, another tv movie/pilot, with Michael Beck (of Warriors fame). neither of those are classics of the martial arts or drama; but, they are still better films.

  10. great podcast rob!!!!!!

    first, i cannot recommend that cannon films doc more!!!! it is a must watch!!!!

    also, i need to do last american virgin with you. that movie is incredible!!!!

  11. My recollection is that I saw Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold at the dollar cinema and King Solomon’s Mines on video (if ever.) Whichever one had Cassandra Peterson I saw, because I used to be a big Elvira fan, and recognized her in a thankless (silent?) role. I don’t recall particularly liking or disliking those movies. Like a lot of ’80s entertainment of my childhood, I observed it passively with a non-critical, positive outlook. I used to be such a sweet sweet thing ‘fore they got ahold of me.

    Even as a Shock Treatment apologist, I turn my nose up at The Apple sight unseen.

    Cobra I saw as a VHS transfer of an HBO presentation from a three movie EP provided by a family friend. I also had an issue of either Mad or Cracked that lampooned it. I was never a big Stallone fan, but at the time it was easily my favorite of his movies, drenched as it was with ’80s cokehead lip sweat over neon lit grinding teeth. I wanted to be Cobra when I grew up, and I’m a disappountment to myself that I’ve never once owned a pair of leather gloves that I wear while unholstering a hand cannon with my own custom logo on the handle. I still admire his Nash and kind of want one in spite of swearing off vintage cars after a two year tragic odyssey of walking more often than not when I had a classic of my own. I still appreciate the slasher movie excess, but when I watched it again about a decade back, I couldn’t quite bring myself to buying it as a fairly cheap DVD.

    Bloodsport I caught on cable in the early ’90s, but it was never my jam, despite going through a brief Jean Claude Van Damme phase that begin with a dollar show viewing of the superior Kickboxer and ended sometime around the one where he played twins (or was it Universal Soldier? Definitely by Timecop.) Bloodsport was too obviously a poor man’s Enter the Dragon, and the highlight was seeing Ogre outside the Revenge of the Nerds franchise.

    Key scenes from Bolero found their way onto a clandestine late night VHS recording I gathered for personal reasons during one of the family’s brief spurts of cable access. Even on a matter of such high priority to a teenager, I couldn’t bring myself to watch the movie to completion, sliding back and forth between it and other channels waiting for the goods to be delivered. Derek was a handsome woman, never really my type, but good in a pinch when the time was right. I think I also saw Tarzan the Ape Man during its theatrical run, randomly and with little recollection.

    I think I saw Masters of the Universe one evening on live cable at the house of the previously mentioned family friend. I was a bit too old for He-Man to be a big draw, but I enjoyed it for what it was while still in my nonjudgmental years. I was fine with Dolph and thought Langella and Foster were perfect, plus Courtney Cox was pretty. Haven’t seen it since, probably won’t ever again. Definitely better than Allan Quartermain and the Lost City of Gold. You can blurb that on the Blu-Ray rerelease. I recall liking the Corman Fantastic Four better, though. The entire cast and crew were such troupers, and they made me care about the Fantastic Four more than anything else in any medium (which isn’t saying a lot, because I don’t care that much, but still.)

    I mentioned this episode to Mr. Fixit on this week’s Marvel Super-Heroes Podcast, since he was the one who got me to watch that Golan-Globus documentary on Netflix. I should have also mentioned that I’ve listened to a bunch of movie podcasts, but they are usually boring overlong slogs with no chemistry between the commentators and just all around suck. “Film” is an unpretentious movie show of reasonable length with a solid host in Rob and a complimentary variety of guests. With the exception of How Did This Get Made, it’s the only movie podcast I listen to with any kind of regularity and enjoy.

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