oHOTmu or NOT Ep.24: Crossfire to Cyclops

A one-eyed assassin. A retro Christian. The cutest of the Inhumans. A faux Greek goddess. An X-Man with a thing for redheads (I know, doesn’t narrow it down). Which are Hot, and which are Not? Find out from our panel of Lovely Ladies in their first ever 5-character take-down!

Featuring permanent panelists Elyse, Isabel, Nathalie, Josée, Amélie and Shotgun, and special guest star, the Legion of Super-Bloggers’ Science Girl herself, Ann Marie!

Listen to Episode 24 below (the usual mature language warnings apply), or subscribe to oHOTmu OR NOT? on iTunes!

Relevant images and further credits at: oHOTmu or NOT ep.24 Supplemental

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23 responses to “oHOTmu or NOT Ep.24: Crossfire to Cyclops

  1. I wouldn’t have thought that Siskoid could have had a wilder group to try and keep on topic. Then in strides Science Girl to bring it all to a whole new level. This was a fun episode. I mean, they all are, but it felt a little bit less restrained (which again, isn’t something I’d have thought was even possible.)

    I have to say that I’m surprised Crossfire had as good a showing as he did and that it largely came down to personality. The look made me cringe and then it was all over when I heard his last name was Cross, because then it just pointed to unhealthy obsessiveness. It’s like if somebody had a last name that’s a color (Green, Black, Brown, etc.) and they exclusively wore that color clothing. That’s weird.

    SPEAKING of unhealthy obsessiveness: Crusader! I’m pretty sure he would not be able to condemn me fast enough so I’ll just say that the ladies are right and that cape is ridiculous. Overcompensate much? Maybe he’s trying to visually justify his weight (side note, whoever assigns the weights on these entries has no concept of human proportions.)

    While I like Crystal, I’m not nearly as bowled over as the ladies were. I think it’s the yellow, which is a color that rarely works for me as anything other than an accent color. I kind of want her hair though.

    Speaking of hair (I’m NAILING the segues today,) Cybele got some Medusa level locks going on (the Inhuman character, not the one from Geek mythology.) I’d lose the crown but SOOOOOO keep the rest. I just love how, despite and insanely deeply plunged V on the upper portion, that ultimately I feel this outfit is all about the hips. And I’ll always be a sucker for thigh high boots.

    And then there’s Cyclops. I knew it was going to be a tough time for ol’ Slim. The word “boring” was used really liberally, which I figured it would be. He suffers badly in the public eye because he’s the generally the responsible adult among the X-Men. In and of itself not awful, but when all the rowdy characters like Wolverine get to be fun that makes the guy telling them to settle down the killjoy even if he’s right. I’ve found that he’s got more going on than he’s usually given credit for, and often shines as a character when not stuck in the by the book leader role. That being said, thank GOD they never used that outfit. He looks somebody body painted a shaved ape. I’ve never liked the complete head covering look on him. I will rarely say this, but thank goodness for the 90s redesign. It let his luscious hair blow in the wind as it’s meant to. The ladies aren’t wrong about the sunglasses making him into a bit of a douche-canoe (though that smirk in the image makes it worse,) but I find that the specific combination of the uncovered hair and the visor to be quite pleasing. And the “can’t look into his eyes” thing wouldn’t get to me too much because my eyes tend to be drawn to lips anyways. So I guess I’m saying, I’d put Cyclops as “hot” if I could just put him in his later outfit. But not this thing. Oh sweet Christmas, not this thing.

    PS – If I don’t at least see a single mocked up page of “Marvelsquitoes” at some point in my life then we as a society have failed.

  2. Funny that one of the girls (yeah, I still get them confused, sorry) thought Crossfire looked like a medical super hero, because he reminds me of the G.I. Joe character Lifeline, who was a medic dressed all in red and white with LOTS of crosses!

    Speaking of crosses, I’m glad someone mentioned that not all Christians are intolerant A-holes in The Crusader discussion. I feel like sometimes it’s the one group that people feel it’s still okay to beat up on. Zealots are intolerant a-hole by their nature, no matter what their creed, and this guy was an a-hole.

    I wonder if all of the girls would have put Cyclops in the “NOT” category if they knew of how Scott left his wife and son the second he heard Jean Grey was still alive, right around the time this issue hit. Sure Madeline ended up being evil later, but he didn’t know that then. Total dick move, and one of the most shameful things a mainstream big-name super hero has ever done in my book…and I actually LIKE the character otherwise!

    Fun show. The addition of Science Girl did add an extra element of chaos to the mix, not that I minded!

    Chris

    1. No, not all Christians are A-Holes, but anyone who adopts the name of “Crusader” will probably be. I do like how he losses his powers when gets the beat down he so richly deserves and doubts his faith. I’d pay real money to see some of the Holier Than Thou nitwits in this world get that treatment from some of the Aesir. 😀

  3. When I was a kid, I always wondered about Crystal’s hair…was the black stripe an accessory, or was it an actual colored streak in her hair? I don’t think they were ever really consistent about it, it was just a cool visual. I do prefer the idea that it’s a natural coloration in her hair that somehow stays in the same place even as her hair grows. Because Terrigen Mists.

    Crusader suffers from a really limited motivation. His opposition to “false gods” means that he’s tailor-made to fight Thor and Hercules…and that’s pretty much it. However, this hasn’t stopped Marvel from bringing him back from time to time, including stories where he goes up against Luke Cage and Wolverine. Why? What’s the point?

    I love Cybele’s look, but it doesn’t really suit her characterization as the Eternal hippie/Earth mother communing with nature. I imagine that she usually spends most of her time naked in the woods (in a “one with nature” sense, not anything sexual) and this outfit is probably something she conjures up on the rare occasions when she has to interact with her fellow Eternals, probably thinking “Is this what they’re wearing these days? Sure, let’s go with this.”

  4. Crystal is Marvel’s version of Donna Troy. She was a crush for many comic readers. And she always was romantically linked to tools. And those readers would wail and gnash their teeth, wondering why the best ines are taken by horrible men.

    Okay, maybe I’ve said too much.

    As for the tag lines, I wouldn’t expect them after every sentence! But after hearing it live, I guess the ‘bang bang’ idea wasn’t a good one,

  5. If someone mentioned this I didn’t hear it, so apologies if I’m retreading something covered while I was distracted…

    Crossfire’s cousin, Darren Cross, was the criminal responsible for Scott Lang becoming the second Ant-Man. In the comics, Daren Cross turns into a big pink knockoff version of the Hulk, but in the 2015 film ANT-MAN, Cross, played by Corey Stoll, is the mad scientist who becomes Yellowjacket.

    1. We didn’t mention it. I only really was reminded when people this week started speculating as to which Ant-Man villain Walton Goggins would play in the next movie.

  6. Great episode ladies and gentleman. I have to admit that I identify with Cyclops on some level, because I grew up filling the role of “responsible older brother” in my family. It strikes me that it would be interesting to compare and contrast Cyclops with TMNT’s Leonardo. Both fit the archetype of the mature, responsible leader, but I get the impression that Leonardo is generally seen in a more positive light by fans than Cyclops. Perhaps Leo possesses more humility or empathy than Scott, or maybe people just like mutant turtles more than mutant humans?

    Of course, I now have the urge to match the other Ninja Turtles up with X-Men. I can see Donatello and Beast as the technical wizards, and Raphael and Wolverine as the angry loners, but I’m not sure who would be Michelangelo’s best X-Men counterpart. I’ll have to think about that some more.

    1. The Leonardo = Cyclops / Raphael = Wolverine comparison is one I support, but you’re right that Leo doesn’t usually get hit with the same fan-hate that Scott does. But I think that’s in part because Leonardo was never defined as the anti-Raphael. During the Wein/Claremont/Cockrum/Byrne X-Men, Cyclops was used primarily as the stick-up-his-butt foil to the boss-hating, too-cool-for-mutant-school Wolverine.

      As for the others, Donatello = Beast, and Michelangelo = Nightcrawler/Iceman/Beast/Colossus.

      1. Good point. Wolverine’s popularity probably hurts Cyclops given the interpersonal conflict that writers have created between them. Cyclops is the ineffective, by-the-book police chief that you’re supposed to dislike, because he keeps holding back the effective, rule-breaking detective (i.e., Wolverine), who is the protagonist of the story. On the other hand, Leo and Raph are sibling rivals, who hold different world views. One of those views is not depicted as being inherently superior to the other. They are just different, each with their own pros and cons.

        Also, since writing my first post, I had been considering Colossus as a counterpart to Mikey, because they both come across as fairly good-natured, laid-back individuals.

        1. I was reading at the time and I don’t believe Cyclops ever became actively disliked by readers until he did the dirty on Maddie and the baby; the storyline also made Jean look bad for having anything to do with him after this.

          I never though Wolverine was cooler than Cyke – he was presented as a total git for the first few years, and when they tacked on the ‘sensitive ninja’ shite, it was as utterly unconvincing as Storm’s instant Mohawk mindset.

  7. Fun episode, as always.

    Catchphrases might be a bit might be a bit much (though would be funny now and then). But for the sake of sometimes sounding like Eposition Lass, it wouldn’t hurt if you guys used each other’s names now and then.

    For Example:
    Unnamed Female #1: I like the color scheme.
    Unnamed Female #2: I disagree Nathalie, that purple and yellow clash too much.

    At least that way we can have more of a chance to identify people other than just the introductions at the beginning.

    When y’all finally finish OHOTMU you will move to DC’s Who’s Who, right …?

    1. To be fair, that does happen, but with 7 people around the table, it gets clunky real fast if it happens with any regularity.

      To us, this is an inside joke, not a problem to be solved.

  8. Another great episode from the Catnadians. J don’t mind not being clever enough to distinguish between the uniformly sleepy-tipsy voices, I love the idea of an OHOTMU hive mind

    Let’s have a look, shall we.

    Crossfire: I like the crotch cross, but the guy reeks of ego; I’d simply steal his trunks and run away.

    Crusader: a big flappy loincloth and tight chainmail, yep, mega hot. And it’d be fun to persuade him to play pagan.

    Crystal: cute but smells of baby vomit and I bet her hair is full of static from throwing electrical bolts.

    Cybele: hot if you liked drag queens.

    Cyclops: hot when drawn by John Byrne in the Savage Land, shirtless and hairy. And never again. Your whimsical notion of Scott on a rotating chair, working as a lighthouse, is hilarious. Beat that!

  9. I love this podcast! The ladies’ takes on these characters are delightful, even when they disparage one I used to be fond of. I had stopped collecting by the time OHOTMU came out, and I am discovering many of these characters for the first time, myself. But now, I overthink things. Like the Crusader. I can accept that there are supernatural forces in Marvel Comics. I can accept that gods walk the earth. But once that layer is peeled back just a little, it drives me nuts! Just what supernatural force EXACTLY gave the Crusader his power? His actions and motivations are the antithesis of Christianity. I can’t accept that Jesus said, “Go down there and kick some pagan ass!” Likewise, it wouldn’t be the god whose name must not be spoken, AKA Yahweh, AKA father of Jesus. There are certainly many people in this country who purport to be Christian, yet don’t ever show it by their actions, but The Crusader takes it too far, even for a funnybook. However, I would love to read what someone like Neil Gaiman would do with such a concept.
    On another topic, Siskoid I may send you a picture of me dressed as Captain America to share with the ladies. It would an honor to be rated by them, even if I’m deemed NOT.

    1. At your own risk.

      As for the Crusader thing, if it speaks to anything, it’s to the dangers of zealotry and distorted dogma. Sadly, these people exist. Replace pagan gods with the LGBTQ+ community, or poor people (as with the branch of Christianity that believes the faithful should roll in money and screw the rest), which is all heresy as far as I’m concerned. The concept almost seems more relevant today than in did in the 80s, where I doubt it was more than a premise for a Thor villain of the month.

      But if the Crusader is powered by anyone, it’s the Devil. I mean, ghosts aren’t exactly part of the Christian world view, are they?

  10. I’m glad the ladies gave Crystal a “Hot”. Although now I’ll forever be thinking Charlie Brown Airbender.

    It made me smile that the gang knew Avatar the Last Airbender. My daughters just discovered the show, and we’re having a great time watching it together. But my girls are too young for this podcast. “Family Show? NOPE!”

    Hmm. Maybe a special episode with the ladies discussing Avatar? Hmm?

    Thanks for the fun episode!

    1. Only two of the group are Avatar/Kora fans and we’re only on OHOTMU issue 3, so unlikely, BUT it could be an idea for a Saturday Morning Fever some day.

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